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Lawyer Jokes

# Title Hits Rating
1 Get away with murder
- |Two prisoners are talking about their crimes:George: "I robbed a bank, and they gave me 20 years"He...Read the whole joke
557 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 Tell the whole truth
- |`You seem to be in some distress,' said the kindly judge to the witness. `Is anything the matter?'`...Read the whole joke
526 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Who handles cases?
- |Nugent needed legal advice, so he walked into the office of Gregory, Ellis and Gregory. Nugent sat ...Read the whole joke
515 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Ask your question
- |One day at a trial, an eminent psychologist was called to testify. A severe, no-nonsense profession...Read the whole joke
517 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 What should they get?
- |Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her classes:"A wealthy ...Read the whole joke
528 Rating:0 | Voted:0
6 Japan is in trouble
- |Take heart, America. Three monkey wrenches have been thrown into Japan's well-oiled economic machin...Read the whole joke
492 Rating:0 | Voted:0
7 From another planet
- |NO ZAMBODIANS, PLEASE: Judge Rules Out Prince Mongo's CostumeMEMPHIS, Tenn. - A judge has ruled tha...Read the whole joke
562 Rating:0 | Voted:0
8 Arguing effectively
- |How to Argue Effectively I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument ...Read the whole joke
527 Rating:0 | Voted:0
9 I want to appeal a case
- |Lawyer: "Judge, I wish to appeal my client?s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence."Judge:...Read the whole joke
479 Rating:0 | Voted:0
10 Leaving money for the dead
- |A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the body o...Read the whole joke
522 Rating:0 | Voted:0
11 Is there a way to thank you?
- |"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubl...Read the whole joke
573 Rating:0 | Voted:0
12 Who owns the cows?
- |After his graduation from college, the son of a Spanish lawyer was considering his future. He went ...Read the whole joke
496 Rating:0 | Voted:0
13 Were you ever arrested?
- |A lawyer was filling out a job application when he came to the question: "Have you ever been arrest...Read the whole joke
573 Rating:0 | Voted:0
14 What is two plus two?
- |An engineer, a physicist, and a lawyer were being interviewed for a position as chief executive off...Read the whole joke
500 Rating:0 | Voted:0
15 Lawyer's club
- |A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for ...Read the whole joke
582 Rating:0 | Voted:0
16 I suppose I earned enough
- |An elderly and somewhat hard-of-hearing man was sitting in a stylish downtown attorney?s office as ...Read the whole joke
497 Rating:0 | Voted:0
17 When you know you must really be drunk
- |A man sat down at a bar, looked into his shirt pocket and ordered a double scotch.A few minutes lat...Read the whole joke
583 Rating:0 | Voted:0
18 I want to take money with me
- |As Mr. Smith was on his death bed, he attempted to formulate a plan that would allow him to take at...Read the whole joke
461 Rating:0 | Voted:0
19 Free advice at social affairs?
- |A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who a...Read the whole joke
635 Rating:0 | Voted:0
20 Space photography
- |The New York Times, among other papers, recently published a new Hubble Space Telescope photograph ...Read the whole joke
562 Rating:0 | Voted:0
21 What's your wife's name?
- |St. Peter is questioning three married couples to see if they qualify for admittance to heaven."Why...Read the whole joke
503 Rating:0 | Voted:0
22 Trying to be impressive
- |A young lawyer, starting up his private practice, was very anxious to impress potential clients. Wh...Read the whole joke
491 Rating:0 | Voted:0
23 What is the oldest profession?
- |A physician, an engineer, and an attorney were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest of ...Read the whole joke
542 Rating:0 | Voted:0
24 What is his occupation?
- |A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first,...Read the whole joke
543 Rating:0 | Voted:0
25 How's business?
- |Two lawyers met at a cocktail party late one night."How?s business?" asked the first."Rotten," repl...Read the whole joke
593 Rating:0 | Voted:0
26 Are you talking to me?
- |At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't ...Read the whole joke
718 Rating:0 | Voted:0
27 Lawyers on a flight
- |An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passenge...Read the whole joke
493 Rating:0 | Voted:0

# Title Category Hits Rating
1 Lawyers on a jury
- |A trial had been scheduled in a small town, but the court clerk had forgotten to call in a jury pan...Read the whole joke
Lawyer Jokes 1264 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 Big ethical dilemma
- |Upon seeing an elderly lady for the drafting of her will, the attorney charged her $100.She gave hi...Read the whole joke
Lawyer Jokes 1253 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 Demise of a partner
- |One day while walking down the street a highly successful partner in a law firm was tragically hit ...Read the whole joke
Lawyer Jokes 1242 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Talk to the judge
- |A judge, bored and frustrated by a lawyer's tedious arguments, had made numerous rulings to speed t...Read the whole joke
Lawyer Jokes 1193 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 Fight to win a case
- |A junior partner in a law firm was sent to a far away country to represent a long-term client accus...Read the whole joke
Lawyer Jokes 1188 Rating:0 | Voted:0

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